118 Of 365 (366) For 2012

[ All credit to InCaudaVenenum, whose lovely picture may be found here. ]

“I thought about how there are two types of secrets:

the kind you want to keep in,

and the kind you don’t dare to let out.”

[ Ally CarterDon’t Judge a Girl by Her Cover ]

84 Of (365) 366 For 2012

[ All credit to William Powe Photography , whose lovely picture may be found here. ]

 

“There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm.”

 

[ Willa Cather The Song of the Lark ]

71 Of 365 (366) For 2012

[ All credit to Molly Ayers whose lovely picture may be found here. ]

 

“It was that kind of a crazy afternoon,

terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything,

and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed a road.”

 

[ J. D. SalingerThe Cather in the Rye ]

41 Of 365 (366) For 2012

[ All credit to Jenn Turner, whose lovely picture may be found here. ]

“But a mermaid has no tears, and therefore she suffers so much more.”

[ Hans Christian AndersenThe Little Mermaid ]

17 Of 365 (366) For 2012

[All credit to Damien Derouene, whose lovely picture may be found here]

“The moon has stepped back like an artist gazing amazed at a work,
That points at him amazed.”

[Ted Hughes“Full Moon And Little Frieda”]

9 Of 365 (366) For 2012

[All credit to Kathelijne2, whose lovely picture can be found here]

“Now the sirens have a still more fatal weapon than their song,

namely their silence…

… someone might have escaped from their singing; but from their silence,

certainly never.”

[ Franz Kafka ]

Show Me How To Bear The Sound Of Silence

“Silence makes the real conversation between friends.

Not the saying but the never needing to say is what counts.”

 

[Margaret Lee Runbeck]

 


Today, whilst searching for the right quote for my daily post in the 365 of 2012 project, I came across this great quote and it got me thinking.

Unfortunately, I can’t seem to find it anymore and I don’t even know who to attribute it to ( I want to say Emerson. It sounds like something Emerson would say or at least something people would attribute to him).

So for lack of exact wording, you will have to make do with what I can recall:

“As we go through life we find, that our closest friends are not the ones who console us and offer words of wisdom, but those who can bear sitting next to us in silence, suffering through the bewilderment and loss that can not be described, without the need for words to connect to us and our feelings”

[Maybe Emerson]

This stunned be (and oh I wished I had been insightful enough to bookmark it). Deeply.

I think mostly, because I’m not good with silence.

And I don’t mean the awkward silence, nobody’s good with those.

And I don’t mean the natural silence, when all has been said, everybody’s good with those.

I mean the painful silence, when someone you feel connected to, suffers.

I can’t bear it!

Not only, because I want to make them feel better. Everybody wants to lift the spirit of people they care about, when those are feeling low.

I can’t bear it, because I need to let them know, with words (many words), that they are not alone, that I am there with them, that I treasure them and I feel for them and feel with them.

I want them to hear my voice reciting the wonders of who they are, so that my voice might echo in them and in response they can hear their own voice repeating it.

Over and over again. Until they believe it or they feign to believe it just to have me shut up – whatever comes first.

I understand, that this is just a way of comforting myself. For if the pain of the one close to me is vanquished (by words), driven back into the misty fog from hence it came, I too can rest easy.

I’m sorry.

I wished, I understood the art of silent companionship in need.

I wished, I could make you feel loved and worthy and understood with my presence and my presence alone.

This is one of the things I want to learn.

To listen to the grieving silence and to bear it.

To make a stand for someone by shutting up.

To give comfort to others and not to comfort myself.

 

For now, I can’t.

Please know, that I only want to see you happy and in the attempt of forcing a smile on your lips (in the hopes it might then enter your heart as well) I fight demons the only way I know how: With loud noises.

So please forgive me, if I talk to much.

I will try to breathe more between sentences at least.